Pasta Carbonara

“Pasta alla carbonara is the Italian term that describes a pasta dish of spaghetti (or another pasta) with a sauce composed of cream, eggs, parmesan cheese, and bits of bacon. ”  – The Food Lover’s Companion (circa I don’t know when since my copy is old and very well loved).

First of all, BITS of bacon? I mean, who are we? Why would I bother putting bacon in something for only bits of it? I have absolutely zero chill when it comes to bacon. If you decide that only “bits” of bacon is good enough for you, please don’t come crying to me when your pasta is not up to par and you have sad feelings. Bless your heart.

Anyway, this is the pasta recipe I get asked most often for. And I fully believe that this recipe should be a part of your pasta lineup. You can have it completed from start to finish in 30 minutes (or less), and it’s delicious. Sometimes, simple really is better.

To kick things off proper I will start off with answers to some questions that have come up over the inquiries for the recipe: Can I make it with zucchini noodles? (NO), Can I use a cheese other than parmesan? (ABSOLUTELY NOT) , Can I use turkey bacon? (GOODBYE TO ALL OF THE FELICIAS).

---

Ingredients:

1 pound pasta

10 slices of bacon, chopped

1 medium onion, diced

4 eggs

6 tbsp. or so of heavy cream

1/3 cup parmesan

black pepper

parsley (for garnish)

---

Directions: 

1. Bring a pot of salted water to a boil. Cook your pasta.
2. Since a watched pot never boils, while you are waiting for your water to boil, drizzle a little olive oil in your dutch oven over medium heat. Add in your bacon and onion, and cook until the bacon begins to take some color. Your kitchen will begin to smell like Jesus’s kitchen at this point, and just ride that wave of glory while you complete the remaining steps.
3. Now that you are a culinary genius and have two pots going on the stove top already, let’s go ahead and step up your game one more notch. Into a bowl, crack your four eggs, add in the heavy cream, the parmesan, and what looks like an irrational amount of black pepper. When your hand gets tired from turning your pepper mill, you have added enough. Whisk this all together.
4. Once the bacon and onion mixture is done, you are going to scrape everything (grease and all) into the bowl with the egg mixture. I know the idea of adding hot bacon and onions to cracked eggs in a bowl sounds a little suspect,  but trust that I would never do you dirty like that. Mix it with a spatula and let it hang out together in the bowl until your pasta is al dente.
5. Once your pasta is done, use a ladle and save about 1/2 cup of the boiling pasta water. Drain the pasta. Put the drained pasta and reserved water into the bowl with the eggs/cream/onions/bacon/parm and mix it briefly. Then, take a dinner plate that is big enough to cover the bowl, and cover it, and let it sit for about five minutes. What you are doing here is “just” cooking the eggs. You don’t want scrambled eggs here, so pay attention soldiers. You want a nice and silky sauce.
6. After five minutes, remove the plate, and mix it all up. To serve, I usually crumble up some more cooked bacon and chopped parsley, and even more black pepper because I love myself.